There is no ‘ I ‘ in an Ideal Marriage
The efforts for a successful marriage don’t end with finding the right partner/ soulmate. Marriage is a journey. And journeys don’t just need a good partner, but also a map in hand.
Before you jump on to think that Love is the Map, read this.
Like any other relationship, Love is the foundation of marriage as well.
There are people who fall in love and then decide to tie the knot. In some cases, people get married first and then sprout the seed of love.
This seed can definitely give birth to a wonderful life, but it needs care and nourishing. The vows to keep the relationship above all, in happiness and in tough times.
Atharva Veda – the “knowledge storehouse of atharvāṇas: procedures for everyday life” shares some powerful mantras to help partners to embark on a happy and loving journey of marriage!
- Thou shall share it all!
Sharing is the key to a successful marriage. The husband and wife should communicate fully and openly and share all their thoughts and feelings with each other.
- Two wrongs don’t make a right
Both partners should possess good traits. The husband should be hardworking, strong yet affectionate. The wife should be calm and supportive. Calm doesn’t mean weak and strong doesn’t mean brutal. Both partners bring individual qualities and work together. These traits will automatically be imbibed by their children, as they learn through the examples set by their parents rather than the preaching.
Love cannot automatically bring Compatibility. Sharing and caring for each other, listening, and accepting the differences develop compatibility over a period of time. It is the most important ingredient for a healthy and long-lasting marriage.
There is no relationship without a few arguments but most important is the resolve.
- Impressions matter
Love could be blind but might still smell a bad odor!
When our senses are limited to the physical manifestations of the world, the laws of physical attraction are bound to be applicable!
Stereotyping of beauty is of course a bad practice but expecting your partner to ignore basic grooming and hygiene is unrealistic.
Both partners should take care of their health and personality to tingle each other’s senses and keep the spark alive!
- Out of sight is out of mind
Researchers can keep statistics on long-term relationships, but we all know how difficult it is to make it work!
Intentionally or unintentionally, in the name of ‘independence’, or ‘professional growth’ couples allow distances to grow. Marriage is about the journey together, so if you are finding reasons to stay apart, consider working on the cause/s.
Duties of the Wifey
The role of the wife in marriage is very crucial. Women have a unique power. She can transform the lives of people around her, making her more responsible and dutiful.
Atharva Veda shares some of the duties that a wife should perform.
- The Lover: A wife should give unconditional love to her husband both emotionally and physically. “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy” keep a check, ladies
- The Advisor: A wife is the most trusted advisor to support or critique her husband, but she is also the one whose backing matters the most to him. Whenever the husband seeks help, she should be proactive in supporting him and working together.
- Growth in harmony:
The wife’s complete success is not just personal, but the overall development and growth of her family.
- Compassion & Dedication: A wife’s dedication to her husband is as important as his dedication to her. She should also be compassionate towards his family.
- The Motivation: She should always have a positive attitude and should be concerned about the happiness of her family. She should not let the negative vibes affect the peaceful environment of the house.
- The Nourisher: A wife can change the House into a home with her love and warmth. She is looked up to, for hope and strength.
Duties of the Hubby
Like the duties of a wife, the husband also has to perform his side of duties for a healthy marriage. Atharva Veda shares some of the duties that a husband should perform :
- The Protector: The husband should protect his family. Towards his wife and other members, he should be sensitive, caring and understanding.
- Work-Life Balance: The husband should lead a disciplined life and have a work-life balance. The husband’s financial stability secures the family’s future, but his presence at home is equally important for the family.
- Respect and Honor: He should always give her the required respect and honor, and cherish her companionship. The wife’s family should also be equally treated with respect.
- Partners in Sickness and in Health: He should always stand by his wife in times of sorrow and difficult situations.
- No secrets: Transparency is the key to a healthy relationship between partners.
“Only friendships blossom into lifetime partnerships.“
Marriage is not a piece of cake. All relationships go through rough patches. But the willingness to fight for the relationship rather than fighting about the relationship make the difference.
Love is the true nature of each and every soul in the universe. Patience, love, understanding and friendship are the pillars for a successful and healthy marriage.